Junebug Bass

A New Normal

Hey everyone,

It has been about a year since we have finished up discipleship school and took our mission's trip to Belgium. You may be wondering why we have not posted anything to our blog this past year. There has been a lot of normal things happening; going to work, getting pregnant, investing in our local community and church. This season felt like a good time to put in the work in a less "tell the social media world about it" way. It has been quite the journey, our biggest and best one being this baby we are about to meet any week now. 

Bed Rest

However, since I have been on bed rest, in a forced "sabbatical" as I have re-named it, the urge to update this blog before this monumental transition begins has increased. You see, a lot of being pregnant and growing this baby has been a front row seat to the miraculous. I believe that pregnancy, a baby growing from one cell to a living, breathing human, can be described as no less than miraculous. Not only have I been inspired due to this miraculous journey but recently this pregnancy has taken a few unexpected turns. James and I were bopping along, doing life, with the whole usual rollercoaster of ups and downs that life provides us when our typical, healthy pregnancy was hijacked by a babe who decided to start making a move (down my pelvis). 

We had gone to church like usual 2 and a half weeks ago when some unexpected, way too much information to share on a blog, type of things occurred in my body. I called one of our midwives, and she said it did seem unusual but not to be too worried even though I was only 34 weeks. Later that day we had gone to our birthing center for one of our birthing classes. That same midwife happened to be there due to a mom going into labor. She took a moment to check me and announced that not only had Junebug dropped (way low) but that my body was preparing for labor. It was too early, at this point in the pregnancy, before 37 weeks it is referred to as preterm labor. A baby's major systems are not ready to go, but especially their respiratory system until 37 weeks. I was given strict instructions on what I could and could not do, one being I needed to stop working. 

A Legacy of Freedom 

I was officially bummed. First off, I had been doing everything right, had a healthy pregnancy, everything was going according to my plan. Everything about this new waiting, doing nothing game, clawed at my want for control and pushed my fear into overdrive. That first morning off from work I was sitting down determined to have a good quiet time with Jesus, and he brought me back to a conversation James and I had recently. 

We had been sitting in the car and the topic of what kind of parents we wanted to be had come up again. It was a typical topic for us, I mean aside from the fact we are pregnant with our first child, we majored in child development and marriage and family therapy for crying out loud. This stuff is our life work and we see the good, bad, and ugly of it everyday in our jobs. I began to talk about how I wanted Junebug to know that they were worth so much more than they produced, that their worth was and always would be ultimately found in who God created them to be. I began crying as I talked about it. The crying was not only from pregnancy hormones (although I'm sure that was a contributor) but from a deep connection with that truth. It has been something only a few years earlier that during a freedom weekend I found out that I had struggled with believing. My nature was to operate out of a place of my worth being found in what I did rather than who I was. I am sure I came about it quite naturally as a natural achiever, first born in my family, and growing up in America (where go getting is our way). The problem with that though is, it isn't the gospel. It is not who I am  as a child of God, nor how I have to operate. In fact, the gospel is quite the opposite. We did not do anything to earn salvation from God, it is a gift that through faith we get to receive. The gospel is not about what we did or what we do even now, it is about what God did and is doing in our life. Paul covers this topic well in Ephesians 2 when he says: 

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no man may boast." 

For me, learning that I was operating under that presumption or really a lie a few years ago, utterly rocked my world. It was not something I was able to give up that one time but something that freed me to begin seeing myself as God sees me more and more. It freed me from not having to live and die by what I had achieved that day or week. As I was realizing this, God reminded me that a forced "sabbatical" to help Junebug stay inside of me was another great opportunity to learn this lesson, that I am more than what I can accomplish on any given day. Believe me, you cannot accomplish much during bed rest, except well, rest. He also gently reminded me that in order to teach this lesson to Junebug as they grow up in our home, I needed to learn it first. 

So for the past two weeks I have had the chance to learn and receive this truth again, that I am more than what I do. In order that one day this baby will hopefully not have to wait til they are 23 years old and at a freedom conference to receive it. My hope is that their norm will be to find their worth in who they are as a child of God first and foremost. 

Now we wait for this baby's arrival with all the feelings of first time parents, excitement, nerves, and anticipation. Junebug, you have made this a good ride, babe. I have learned so much just by carrying you these 9 months and I know that it will only increase as you teach me more the rest of your life. Meet you face to face soon, okay? 

Love,

Your Mom